This year I am not making resolutions….


Christmas this year is making me happy and yet melancholy at the same time. I miss family who are no longer with us and I have been thinking a lot about those I know who are having a tough time. I have friends & family who are grieving from losing loved ones and some for who just things are not going too great, at home, work, you name it.

Then there are some really good things to look forward to in 2016, like new babies coming, weddings to attend and my new office, which is almost ready!

2015 has been a busy and exciting year for me. Here some of the highlights I can think of (in no particular order!):

  1. I fulfilled one of last year’s resolutions and learnt to crochet.
  2. We remodelled my front garden so that I have not had to cut any grass this year!
  3. I had a brilliant reunion with old friends at Bluestone in Pembrokeshire, where we reminisced and giggled, as well as discussing how our lives have changed over the past 10 years.
  4. I left one job and joined another, with exciting and new opportunities and experiences, working with a team who are genuine and hardworking.
  5. I was shortlisted for the Certified Financial Planner professional of the year award.
  6. Basil has lived with me for over a year and is now a lovely, funny, sweet natured cat.
  7. Jackson was born and I became a ‘real’ Auntie for the first time. I am so proud of Geraldine and the wonderful mum she has become.
  8. My brother, Oliver, proposed to his girlfriend and there will be a fabulous Anglo-Sikh wedding in 2016. I get to have two outfits.
  9. My family have spent another year being healthy and happy and long may it continue.

So, as 2016 approaches we will no doubt all spend some time looking back to the past, but more importantly, forward to the coming year. It’s a time to reflect on the changes we want (or need) to make and resolve to follow through on those changes.

Last year I decided not to give myself unrealistic resolutions and set only a couple. They were, to enjoy work and stress less and to learn to crochet. I gave up on the exercise more, eat better – as that’s just a given and something we know we should all do anyway.

I have managed to achieve both of these resolutions, although the ‘less stress’ takes work each day, as it’s easy to let things get too much.

I have read that most people fail to achieve the resolutions they set at New Year. Either they forget, get distracted, or give up. Year after year people set the same resolutions but don’t quite get there. Is that because we make these things too huge and unachievable?

I have been thinking that instead we should look at it like setting a goal at any other time of the year and maybe we shouldn’t make such a big deal out of it.

Goals / aims / ambitions are important in life. They help us to function every day. Be it setting goals and planning for your finances, or for a specific event like a wedding or party, get the note pad out and start your plan. It will make you happier!

Here are some important reasons for setting goals.

  1. It’s how we get things done – we set ourselves tasks/goals every single day. To eat, get dressed, get to work.
  2. They can make us feel good – we get satisfaction and happiness by aiming for a target / goal.
  3. It’s how our brain works. Most other creatures work on instinct, humans take action based on planning.
  4. Goals mean clarity – they provide vision and direction so that we don’t waste resources (time, money or energy).
  5. Goals can measure progress and give us purpose.
  6. Goals keep us connected to others. Common goals / interests are the foundation block of families, friends and colleagues.

So, what will 2016 bring for you?

For me it shows signs of being a great year. I am happy at work and home and we will be able to work at the new office. I’m Bridesmaid for my friend Becca and Oliver’s Sikh-Anglo wedding will be wonderful.

So this year I have decided I am not setting resolutions, but rather things I want to do more or less of. Here is my list so far:


Finally, my New Year wish is that Basil will sit on my lap.

Best wishes for Christmas and 2016 and have fun!



Hobbit at home

home work

Working from home for the last few months has been hard. The novelty of ‘no commute!’ and ‘no office politics!’ soon wears off and you risk becoming a little hobbit, isolated and alone in your office come spare room, and I’ve never liked hobbits.

Despite that I am often out and about to see clients, this doesn’t take up all week and there needs to be time taken to write-up meetings and get the advice out the door. So you then spend a large amount of hours alone.

It makes you consciously aware of your flaws! Laziness, ability to be distracted, tendency to procrastinate, lack of self-discipline, of conscientiousness, and need to check with someone else that what you are doing is right every 30 seconds.  Your days become a personal battle between your good and bad qualities.

It’s honestly more isolating and more draining than my old commute. I have found I’ve become quite emotional, since I can’t regularly express any exasperation, happiness or stress to anyone else, other than to Basil (!), so I think it all builds up.

I’ve taken for granted in the past how much you gain from seeing your colleagues and having a quick 10 minutes talking about your weekend plans or to share joys or problems. Doing this on the phone is just not the same.

The second worst problem is the fact that my office is now my home and my home is now my office. I used to love coming home to my home, my haven and enjoyed my space, time out, alone. Now, there’s not really any true escape.

Whilst of course, when working in an office you still fret about the work awaiting you on your desk, or check your email on the mobile out of hours, but there is still a great advantage and mental release in being able to walk out of the building when your day is done, and mark the beginning of a time and a space that officially belongs to you.

The good news is that in the New Year this will all be easier as I will be in an office. We got the keys this week! It will be small and basic and just as an administration hub to begin with, but I can work on a daily basis with the other members of the team and we are all looking forward to it.

We get desks next week and phone lines the week after and it can’t come quick enough for me! Roll on 2016 when we can be there full time!